Breathe……….

Well, I am clearly not a frequent blogger……………but as I am on holiday this week I thought I would share the thread that God and I are exploring - writing often helps me to smooth thoughts out!

Breath, our breathing, that is what has been on my mind (and in my lungs!), this summer.  That is what has come back to me over and over again via different sources (putting aside Baader-Meinhof for another discussion!)

It began with a morning contemplation on the beach in Wales where I was struck by noticing that our breath is just like the tide; it ebbs and flows, it comes in waves, those waves differ in size and intensity, it keeps on going day and night until it is finished……..

There is something about breath that has the message of our connectedness - our being human and part of this whole physical universe……..

And then, whilst still pondering all of this I go to a Forest Church session at Greenbelt and we are invited to consider God as breath in the universe, to consider that we cannot describe God as we cannot describe breath, that all descriptions fall short………..breath as the Spirit of God in us is………indescribable.

Taking it a step further; our breath gives us intimate connection with God but also with the world in which we live - that exchange of air and its components between us and plant life and other animals.  And then considering that through our breath we are connected physically to one another - I breath the air you breath - how can we harm or look down on one another when we share the same breath?

And there is something about receiving and giving in breath - we have to do both in the universe - and in a balanced way……to enable the other…….so that we all thrive and grow together………sometimes we are not good at doing both these things.


I bought a badge, designed by Micah Purnell, which says 'we breath shallower now' (see here for this work and more: http://www.micahpurnell.bigcartel.com/product/we-breathe-shallower-now), and am considering how true this is - in all ways as Micah implies.

And this morning I was reminded that this breath theme thing has been going on a bit longer than this summer - maybe it is this years theme - maybe God is reminding me to breath through all that is on my plate!………..I was reminded that I spoke about breath at our Pentecost service this year - am I allowed to quote from my own sermon?????  Well, here it is anyway:

'If the Church is the body of Christ on earth then the Holy Spirit is, or should be, that body’s breath of life.
Our physical breath has to be breathed in – we decide how much we breath in – we can breathe deeply or have shallow breathing – there is no charge and no restriction on how much we breathe in – make the most of that it’s one of the last freebies!  But most people breathe with only a small part of their lungs.And it is the same with God’s Holy Spirit – what would happen if the holy catholic Church, if we in our part of it, opened up a little wider to let more of that breath of life in.  If we all took gulping great big breaths of God’s Holy Spirit – breathing it in and breathing it out - what kind of Church might we become?'

I have become more aware of my breathing, more aware of the gift that it is, more aware that it is a great leveller, a great way of connecting with our humanity and our earthiness whilst also connecting with God's spirit, that holy breath and breather in us.  I have been reminded to breathe…….something we all need to be reminded of………..great big lung-fulls of the life giving breath of God.

Bricks without straw…………..

This week, my Lent reflections directed me to a passage in the book of Exodus chapter 5.

That same day Pharaoh commanded the taskmasters of the people, as well as their supervisors, 'You shall no longer give the people straw to make bricks, as before; let them go and gather straw for themselves.  But you shall require of them the same quantity of bricks as they have made previously; do not diminish it, for they are lazy; that is why they cry, 'Let us go and offer sacrifice to our God.'  Let heavier work be laid on them; then they will labour at it and pay no attention to deceptive words.

The people of Israel are forced to try to make bricks without straw.  An unreasonable expectation from Pharaoh and one which they could not meet.

I have been struck by the number of conversations I have had this week that have brought this text back to mind:

the conversation with an older woman who lives alone and whose family and relatives are too busy to visit her; whose nephew comes to the door to deliver a birthday card but cannot come in because he has not got time;

the conversation whilst having my eyes tested with an optician feeling trapped by the continual drive to work more in order to have more, despite his best efforts to convince himself to do otherwise;

the conversation with a friend who is married to a teacher and is worried about the pressure he is under from supervision, examination of his marking, SATs results, competition among colleagues and the pressure of keeping up with changes;

the conversation with a young man only just starting out in his working career and who is finding the pressure of the expectations of the company he is working for too much already;

We are not being asked to make bricks without straw, but we are being asked to produce the same (or more), with fewer staff and less time to recuperate.  Levels of stress are high.  The work place has become toxic in many many places and it seems the drive to work longer hours (unpaid), and to make what we do at work the number one priority in our lives has got out of hand.

When did we begin the competition on who could work with the highest level of stress and desperation?  When did boasting about how busy and overworked you are become something to boast about?

Another conversation - with a friend whose employer was asking them all to fill in cards re-committing themselves to their employer.  This felt like idolatry.

I am not saying we should not be committed to our work, neither am I saying we should not work hard and do our best.  It simply seems we have got out of balance.  The 'Egyptians' in the form of the forces of productivity, consumerism and competition are in control.  And they are hard taskmasters.  And the people are exploited.  And the people are so distracted that they cannot pay attention to the call of God who says 'my yoke is easy and my burden is light'.

We were not created to live this way.  I am opting out - please stop me if you see I am getting sucked in!

Don't box me in (please!)

Over the last couple of weeks I have been thinking about the boxes I put people into and the boxes other people put me into - a not new train of thought for me. 

I have always disliked and verbally fought against being 'boxed' (unlike my daughter's cat - see above!), and like to think of myself as being able to fit into any situation/group/box!  But does that mean I don't have a box of my own?  And is being able to fit into any box a box in itself?  And have I boxed everyone else outside my 'box'?  And how can we be free of being defined and confined by these things?

'It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.'  Galatians 5:1 

In this I hear that we are freed from the boxes of life - freed to be the people that we were created to be and therefore not confined to, or restricted to certain ways of being, certain attitudes, certain conversations, certain patterns of thought.  Rather we are free to explore and to be part of and to delight in all areas of life that are the good parts of God's creation.  Freed to be whole and not part.  And I have come to think that all the 'boxing' we do restricts and shapes the avenues of expression and development open to us.

There is something about 'boxing' that is about closing down.  We did it when we boxed the church into its traditions and defined ourselves by what we do not do/what we do not believe.  We do it with our class structures that define what is 'right' to wear and read and think, and what style of life is acceptable.  And I am beginning to consider how we do it with our allocation/construction of gender. 

We supremely have 'masculine' and 'feminine' boxes, and we find ourselves put into one or other box based on our genetalia.  It is then that we discover the ways of being which are contained in the box that we have been given.  The patterns of behaviour, thought and lifestyle that are 'allowable' or 'expected' of us.  Our 'gender' becomes something we learn how to live out, a social phenomenon rather than a birth gift.  It can take a lot of wrestling and confusion to begin to realise we are in a box at all - even more to begin to transcend it.

I have been reading some of the writings of Judith Butler on gender acts and am still exploring what she is saying - forgive my fledging thoughts and please help me with them!

There is also something in here of Richard Rohr's concept of first and second half of life living - that the boxes are useful to begin with but we do need to move beyond them if we are to become whole.

Over the last few weeks, I have experienced the surprise of others when I have openly been 'in the wrong box' in their eyes.  I have also reflected upon the missed opportunities caused by my boxing of another.  There is much to think about here.

Beginning

Well, this is the first post in an experiment in sharing thoughts within a public space.  I would like to think that this could be a place to explore ideas and to learn from one another, and so I gently and somewhat hesitantly ease open the window but push it wide with a surge of bravery.  This weekend, as I received encouragement (and instructions) on 'blogging' from a new sister, the woad seed which was planted just over a week ago pushed its first leaves through the soil.  A sign of a new beginning, a new adventure?  I hope so.

Woad seedling